1. What do you do?
RALPH: Play guitar, sing backup vocals, sleep, and ninja train in the daytime—kick butt at nighttime.
MICKEY: I jump up and down and yell about stuff, swing the mic-chaku around, and give out the free pizza, motivational platitudes, and high kicks. Sometimes I sing too.
JUNE: Play keys, flute, and sing leads and backups. Hone my psychic skills.
LEON: Rip leads, study chord charts, protect the innocent, but pretty much just always drilling scales.
DANNY: Play bass and install secret gizmos and weapons into everyone’s instruments.
CHIP: I play drums and align the rest of the band with the ever burning spirit of the ninja.
2. Why do you do it?
RALPH: It’s all I know.
MICKEY: I dunno. Beats workin’, I guess.
JUNE: Why does anyone do anything? For the love of it.
LEON: There will always be someone who needs Cowabunga Pizza Time and my job is to make sure we are there to help!
DANNY: Because I have rhythm in my soul and it’s important to always be prepared.
CHIP: Because one must do if one can.
3. What Baltimore stereotype annoys you the most?
RALPH: That everywhere is “The Wire”
MICKEY: That the city’s problems are the result of the people who live here not working hard enough to fix them or not caring enough about each other. That’s a load of bullshit. Can I say bullshit?
JUNE: That it’s SO super scary and dangerous and it always will be. Yes, bad things happen, but people need love and assistance, not disdain and ignorance.
LEON: That we bleed orange and purple . . . we don’t bleed.
DANNY: That we have “fatbergs” floating around the sewers here. I’ve never seen one.
CHIP: To be annoyed is to separate oneself from the whole of the universe and presume to be above it.
4. Favorite Baltimorean?
RALPH: As long as you’re not an asshole—all of you.
MICKEY: Tie between the “don’t urinate on my leg” lawyer dude from TV and Kyle Merman.
JUNE: There are too many people to love to pick just one.
LEON: Chip has driven me and inspired me beyond words so I would probably pick him.
DANNY: Ottmar Mergenthaler.
CHIP: Tom Tasselmyer.
5. Favorite restaurant/eatery?
RALPH: Pizza, pretty much any of them.
MICKEY: American Wings and Pizza.
JUNE: Paulie Gee’s pizza.
LEON: I usually don’t have much time to go out to eat. I love ordering pizza from Spartan’s and eating it at home in the pair.
DANNY: Joe Squared.
6. Last thing you bought?
RALPH: Component ingredients for smoke bombs.
MICKEY: A bag of Utz crab chips, a pineapple soda, and two packs of Magic cards.
JUNE: Pad See Ew and a yoga class.
LEON: Pizza and guitar picks.
DANNY: A soldering iron.
CHIP: Money is a manmade concept that holds no value in the realm of spirit.
7. Last thing you read?
RALPH: Dark Nights Metal: “Batman: The Murder Machine.”
MICKEY: I’ve got two comics and an anarchist zine by my bed that I need to finish.
JUNE: A piece of music.
LEON: Frank Zappa’s autobiography.
DANNY: “The Essential Inventor’s Guide” (2010 edition).
CHIP: “The Watchmen.”
8. Last Facebook post or tweet?
RALPH: “Don’t be a dingus, Come out to our album release show at ottobar on January 26th 2018, dingus.”
MICKEY: I post links to music I like. Have you heard that new Andrew W.K. song yet?
JUNE: A video of an adorable man rapping while bathing his cat.
LEON: I don’t use social media too often. It clouds the mind. That being said the last thing I posted was a cute little kitty cat . . . playing a guitar . . .
DANNY: “Hey Table Legs, this razzleberry is happening tonight at the Thermos Center!” (I”ve been unsuccessfully trying to start new slang words)
CHIP: A Tide Pod meme.
9. What do you believe in?
MICKEY: I believe in Human Power.
JUNE: Love rules all, but touch my keys and die.
LEON: Practice makes perfect, hard work, and my totally radical Cowabunga pals.
DANNY: Perpetual Motion, perfect devotion, the things I never had, my Mum and my Dad.
10. What do you wish you’d known when you were younger?
RALPH: The sooner you start training the sooner you start kicking ass.
MICKEY: To never give up, but to have the guts to ask for help when you need it.
JUNE: To trust myself.
LEON: Things tend to work out.
DANNY: Ohm’s Law.
CHIP: Knowledge without experience can be as dangerous as ignorance.
11. “The Wire”—yea or nay?
RALPH: Mostly good, final season was kinda meh.
MICKEY: RE-ELECT FRANK SOBOTKA.
JUNE: Never seen it.
LEON: Is that the one about Baltimore?
CHIP: “Pink Flag” was a good album.
12. What are you tired of?
RALPH: I keep leaving my sai behind after battles. Gotta stop doing that.
MICKEY: Waking up every day to hear some new pile of Trump related bullshit. I can still say bullshit, right?
JUNE: Misogyny. Destructive gender roles.
LEON: All of this Nazi crap. Cowabunga Pizza Time does not play around when it comes to a Nazi threat. They better keep out of Baltimore or they’re gonna find themselves in a world of hurt!
DANNY: Of waking up tired.
CHIP: The importance of significance.
13. What are you grateful for?
MICKEY: Yeah, and our friends too.
UNE: My ability to make music and kick ass. I can say ass, right?
LEON: Rock and roll, pizza, and good friends.
CHIP: The beauty of existence.
14. Favorite quote?
RALPH: “DEATH TO VIDEODROME! LONG LIVE THE NEW FLESH!’
MICKEY: “If you think you’re too old for rock & roll, then you are.”
JUNE: “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” – Elbert Hubbard
LEON: “You will only achieve if you let go of your doubt and push past your limits.” – Chip
DANNY: “Invention, my dear friends, is 93 percent perspiration, 6 percent electricity, 4 percent evaporation, and 2 percent butterscotch ripple.”
CHIP: “It’s okay not to know but not okay not to ask.” – David Lieberman
15. Best gift you ever received?
RALPH: Probably Nintendo.
MICKEY: My first bike.
JUNE: The little girl growing in my womb right now.
LEON: My guitar!
DANNY: A graphing calculator.
16. Favorite local nightspot?
RALPH: Anywhere with a stage, some loud as hell speakers, a bar, and is within range of pizza delivery.
MICKEY: Sidebar, l think. I really miss Liam Flynn’s.
JUNE: Sidebar. Ottobar. Windup Space. Metro Gallery.
LEON: I spend most of my time at home in the sewer dojo.
DANNY: Engineers Club of Baltimore
CHIP: Windup Space, Ottobar, or Sidebar.
17. If your life were a book, what would the title be?
RALPH: “Cowabunga Pizza Time: Out of the Shadows.”
MICKEY: “My Life as an Idiot”
JUNE: “’She Can Really Wail’: The Story of June”
LEON: “Practice, Patience, and Pizza: A Story of Determination, Discipline, and . . . Pizza.”
DANNY: “The Phenomenology of Living in the Sewer.”
CHIP: “What Are You Even Saying?”
18. What do you want the most?
RALPH: Justice and pizza.
MICKEY: Fellowship and pizza.
JUNE: Equality and pizza.
LEON: Skill and pizza.
DANNY: Knowledge and pizza.
CHIP: Discipline and pizza.
19. What do you look for in a significant other?
RALPH: Fundamental martial arts understanding and a good pizza recipe.
MICKEY: Someone that loves cartoons, wants the world to be a better place for everyone on it, and can burp at least as loudly as I can.
JUNE: Ninja skills, music skills, emotional intelligence.
LEON: Someone that can appreciate a slice and some good rock!
DANNY: A good library and a working knowledge of electronics.
CHIP: A stillness of mind and purity of soul.
20. Why Baltimore?
RALPH: Because Baltimore is our home.
MICKEY: That’s kind of a big question.
JUNE: Is there anywhere else, really?
LEON: We love the people.
DANNY: It’s a strategic location near the pizza belt.
CHIP: Why ask why?